The Baking Bhoys – Want Aways, the Brighton Rock and Greggs the Baker, copyright Sandman

No, this is not a photo of ‘Butlin’s Got Talent 2022’ Runner-up ‘White Men Can’t Jump (Tackle, Cross or Shoot), it’s more of a social media shot of Shane Duffy, Kristoffer Ajer, Ryan Christie and Celtic star Greg Taylor enjoying their summer vacation – somewhere it’s probably Skegness or Bognor Regis, after all we all know Kris has a bit of a fear of heights, and flying to Ibiza was ruled out early on. Yes, we know it’s in Greece, but you understand.

Apparently, the photo received thousands of likes and messages on Instagram within half an hour of posting it, with only a few of them asking why Shane Duffy was giving Kris Ajer a two-fingered nipple rub under his shirt . Meanwhile, the majority of the other replies asked for information about the release date of their first single. Just what the world needs another flippin’ Boy Band!

Well, in the shade of Shane Duffy’s nap, Color me Badd might be about to make a long-awaited comeback – better watch old Shane from Factor 30, in fact, there’s the name of your group right there people. I’d ask for my 10%, but I’d probably better put it in the collection box.

But the signs are clear that making money in the shark-infested waters of the music industry is tough, as it appears Ryan has taken time out from his duties as a summer kitchen doorman to pose for the photo. In the meantime, if Greg wants to be the songwriter, it’s probably best to go to the buffet bar at the Beachcomber Bar, because everyone knows the songwriter must have, say, a little bit of puppy fat. around the belly and jowls – you’re just bending over to pass the Greg gathering.

Luckily for the four, dreams of pop stardom are only for the summer, as Shane Duffy, after a difficult time at Celtic, enjoyed a superb season with Brighton, Ryan was promoted to the EPL with Bournemouth and Ajer lifted the ‘We avoided Relegation Cup’ with Brentford. Yet only one of these budding pop stars will play Champions League football next season – you tell them Greg my Bhoy!

But as everyone knows that a football career is short and the cliched path to the media is not for everyone, so white men may not know how to jump (tackle or shoot) are just preparing for a career after football. Maybe Fate is calling after all!

Niall J.